Image credit: Creative Commons Zero - CC0

Love or madness

We aren’t meant to be.
You, with your accepted, celebrated, right life.
Me, with my demons, darkness, and open wounds,
Scratched incessantly by flames of reality.

I write your name, several times.
Sometimes adjacent to mine.
They look like they belong to one another.
A seemingly fluid, one.

I scratch mine out again.
Because I can’t see you bleed,
But what remains of you without me,
Is a coarse shadow that wails.

I caress that fragment, I cradle that ‘we’
I say it aloud, in my voice, my pores.
No one hears it but me.
Your smell, your voice that wrap themselves, in my idea of me.

I look for reasons, ways and means,
To say our names together.
I often tell everyone about you, like you are a part of me.
An ‘us’ I always say. An ‘ours’, A ‘together”. A forlorn forever, only in me.

I run, course-less. Sifting through memories,
That make me believe we are together.
Maybe in an alternate world,
Where the sun and moon rise together.

I burn like that scorching sand,
In the love for the sun. She knows she can’t look away,
And she stares the way only she can.
I absorb your absence and burn.

They say I am mad. Why don’t I just see that we aren’t meant to be.
Be rational, they say. Be kind, they say.
How do I tell them,
That I know I live because I ache.

You love being in pain they say,
‘Are you mad’ I often laugh.
And then I wonder who really is,
The ones who ask or the ones who are.

I bleed, I peel, I burn my love
I ache, I wait, I scorch my love
You with your back towards me, deaf to my cries,
I howl, and my tears scream, for your arms to hold me love.

I feel your hands, gently touch my neck.
Your fingers pressing against my waist.
I hear your voice in my head, gently caressing my words.
Your lips brushing against my burning skin, your breath in my hair.

Say this isn’t real.
Oh, what do you even know.
Pain keeps us alive my love,
Just let it show.

They say, we aren’t meant to be.
In this curated rational world.
How do I tell them, that ‘we’ already are
In a world that deserves to be.

I love you. And I am yours.
Every time, the day ceases to be.
In the deep oceans of my mind and heart,
We are always meant to be.